Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak whispers o’er the fraught heart and bids it break. MacBeth
I’m sorry I haven’t been around much. On April 2nd my Mom passed away and it’s been a tough couple of weeks. Mom was a sweet, fun woman who was also one of the most optimistic people I will probably ever know. One of her failsafe messages is in the title of this blog post; ”let’s make this a happy time.” She never meant it to sound trite or a Polly Anna answer to the pain we all must feel and overcome at different points in our lives. She meant it as a call to live for today, find the strength to work out the rough spots and strive towards what makes you happy, even in the worst of circumstances.
Today, in spite of the vague uncomfortable feeling that there’s a part of me missing that I’ll never retrieve, I’m going to honor Mom by making this a happy time and tell you about four remarkable young men who call themselves The Buried Life. 
Taking their cue from the poem The Buried Life by Matthew Arnold which warns against living a life that’s not your own or ”buried”, these four guys from British Columbia, brothers Jonnie and Duncan Penn and their friends Dave Lingwoood and Ben Nemtin set off to achieve the 100 items on their bucket lists and most remarkable of all work to help others achieve their own wishes. They’ve done everything from play basketball with Obama to help a young man raise money for a kidney transplant.
I’m coming late to The Buried Life’s party, they’ve had a show on MTV for two years and I just heard about them a couple of weeks ago in USA Today. Oy! Waaay late.
However, they just released a book in March. Part inspiration and part poster art, their book also asks the question, “What Do You Want To Do Before You Die?”
Have you made a bucket list of things you want to do? I made my own list several years ago. At the top of the page is my number one goal, to make my dream of being a published author come true. I’m working tirelessly on that one 
The second and third things on my list have to do with my Mom. Number two is to take a road trip with my husband across Eastern Canada to my Mom’s hometown of North Sydney, Nova Scotia to visit with relatives, see the old sights, and also to relive the long road trip that me, my brothers and sister used to take with Mom and Dad when we were kids. My last visit to Cape Breton took place 30 plus years ago! I’m happy to say that hubby and I are going in 2013. 
Number three on my list is to find out anything I can about my Mom’s Mom, my grandma, who died when my mother was a little girl. Sadly, very little is known about her (we know she was born in either Liverpool or Edinburgh) and my attempts to find her in ancestry records always hits a dead-end. I haven’t given up trying…her name was Kathleen Eunson… just in case serendipity strikes and one of you have a relative with the same last name. Wouldn’t that be incredible?
I’d like to end my post today with one of my favorite quotes and a thank you to my Mom for teaching me these lessons long before I ever read Edith Wharton’s words.
“In spite of illness, in spite even of the archenemy sorrow, one can remain alive long past the usual date of disintegration if one is unafraid of change, insatiable in intellectual curiosity, interested in big things, and happy in small ways.” Edith Wharton
Thanks Mom. I love you.
Now it’s your turn to make this a happy time:) Do you have any lessons from a departed loved one that you’d like to share? I’d love to hear their messages. What are the top three items on your bucket list?
Have a happy, healthy day!
Hugs, Kate ~
I’m so sorry for your loss. I like your post. I’m doing some of the things on my bucket list, but I keep adding new ones, so the bucket never gets even close to empty!
Good for you in keeping your bucket list growing Liz. I guess I don’t want an empty bucket either. LOL
Kate, my heart goes out to you and your family. Your mother sounds like a wonderful person and you are truly blessed to have her influence in your life.
Sailing is one of those bucket lists of things on my list and here we are. Writing and publishing is in a close race.
Thanks for sharing this information today, I’m inspired for my own post.
Thanks for the kind words Nancy. Boy, you tackled that bucket list in a big way, didn’t you? I so admire the courage of your family. I hope you’re writing a book about your journeys, not just the sailing, the inner journey too. I’m so glad this post inspired you, that’s a lovely compliment!
Sending you big hugs, Kate. It will take time to get beyond the grief, but it sounds like you already have a plan. Your mom sounds much like my own. No matter what happened in life she’s always seen the positive side and did whatever she could to brighten everyone else’s day.
Being published and successful at selling my books; visiting my mom’s hometown of Kansas City, MO to get a feel for where she lived and try to find relatives of her adoptive father; tracking my mom’s geneology-she was an orphan, the orphanage burned down and she has two possible birth certificates. I can relate to dead ends. I’ll have to make a lot of money with my books so I can hire someone to find her relatives.
It’s kind of freaky that your top bucket list items are so similar to mine.
Anyway, celebrate the little tings that make you smile and keep the big things in place, maybe with a collage to visualize it all better. Mom will always be with you and I’ll bet she’s telling you, “Let’s make it a happy time”, now.
Thinking of you, Kate.
It’s always nice to meet a fellow traveler on the bucket list journey, Marcia:) It’s incredible that we have such similar goals. We are very fortunate to have Mom’s with such sunny attitudes. Just think, we get to pass this on and on and on through the generations for them. Thanks for your comforting words, it means a lot.
Beautiful post, Kate. I don’t have a bucket list, but I have a “When I’m a rich, bestselling author” list. And I just started doing one thing I’ve always wanted to do regularly, and that’s ballroom dancing. I’ve been going every week for the past three, and private lessons are on that list.
Oooh, I like the idea of when I’m a rich bestselling author list. Good for you on the ballroom dancing! I have another friend who takes lessons and she just beams when she talks about it. The music, the exercise, learning to move so gracefully, it has to be rewarding!
What a beautiful post, Kate. I don’t have a bucket list, but like Angela I do have that “when bestselling author” list. For me, it’s all about creating the office of my dreams. (That doesn’t sound too dreamy, but it’s what I really want!)
So glad you are pursuing your list, Kate. {{Hugs}} to you for those catch-your-breath moments when you miss your mom.
Thanks Bridgette, that’s exactly how it feels, “catch your breath moments” she enjoyed so much in this world and now when I see the things she enjoyed ( a dog running, a foggy morning etc) it brings tears but they’re tears of joy and sorrow. I was lucky to have a Mom who appreciated so much about this world.
Aren’t we lucky to have had mothers who left us with such wonderful memories? They will live on forever in our hearts and minds.
I don’t have a bucket list but rather a wish list. Whatever we call it, making plans and having dreams is an integral part of living life to the fullest.
Sending you a hug.
We are lucky Patricia! You’re right, making plans and having dreams is integral to living life to the fullest. Thanks for the hug, friend.
Awww, Kate, sending huge hugs to you. Sorry I’m late to the party, but you have been in my thoughts. Your bucket list items sound lovely. I’m impressed with those four boys for starting so young!
It warms my heart to read about your mom ~ your love for her shines through every word of this blog. I do believe when we lose someone they continue to live in us and we should celebrate their life instead of dwelling on our loss. Your mom sounds like an awesome lady. You’re very fortunate for having had her in your life. I hope you’re able to find your grandma’s history. There has to be something out there, somewhere.
Thanks for all your lovely words and kind thoughts. I hope I find something about my grandma too.
I have this belief that all good moms have automatic entry into Heaven. I’m sure she’s in a better place. My mother and mother-in-law are probably making your mom create a whole new world of “Happy Times.” My condolences…
Thank you. I’m grinning from ear-to-ear just thinking about it.
Kate,
I’m very sorry to hear about your mom. I’m glad you’re making the trip to Nova Scotia.
My bucket list has changed a lot as I’ve gotten older. It’s less me-centric and more focused on family. Certain family members of my mom’s generation has been at odds for decades. Because of this, I’ve never met some of my cousins. I think there’s over 25 of us! I decided to plan a cousin reunion which will take place in Singapore. Most of them live in Singapore, Malaysia or Australia so I’m hoping they’ll be able to make it. I want to get to know them. It’s so weird to see them on my FB page and know that this cousin doesn’t know that cousin.
Have you tried researching other spellings of your grandmother’s name?
I got the shivers when I read your comment — the good kind — of shivers when I read about your plans for Singapore. What a tremendous event this will be, I’d love to be fly on the wall just to see the joy on everyone’s face. I wish you every success with making it happen and I hope you’ll take pictures and blog about it too.